I commented on a post about loneliness the other day. About why it is that we think doing things by ourselves is so freaking scary! Yet it teaches you who you are, it allows you to focus on what you like and in the end, we are all alone, aren’t we?
I know so well, the feeling of arriving in a new hostel, you don’t know anybody and feel like everybody is staring at you. Thinking how sad it is you are by yourself and that they’re glad they’re not in your shoes! Think again. Most likely half of the people there arrived by themselves and has been in your shoes. And think about it again. If you saw somebody arriving by themselves, would you think: “That poor kid, all by herself, doesn’t know anybody here”.
Same goes for eating out by yourself. Ok, maybe not half of the people in the restaurant have been in your shoes but still, I bet they would like to have the courage to walk into a nice restaurant and eat by themselves. Reading a book while you eat, or sit at the bar to talk to the bartender are ways of making yourself more comfortable doing it. It takes your mind off wondering what people around you might think of you.
I have come across numerous situations in which I found myself alone. When I wonder how the hell I’m going to survive all by myself. My mind starts going mental with all the possible thoughts other people might have seeing me there, until I give myself a little speech: They are not staring at you, it’s just in your head. Just do it, what do you have to lose? It’s not like they will kill you. You don’t know anybody here and they don’t know you. You will never have to see them again in your entire life. They won’t go home thinking how weird you are. Do you remember every person you have ever seen alone? NO!
Another thing I always repeat to myself is this one quote an English guy I met in Australia wrote on my diary:
“You only regret the things you didn’t do, not the things you did do”
I know the quote was not his and that many people have said it but it was him that taught me this lesson. A lesson I will never forget and am very thankfull of. It has made me do things I thought I could never do. As long as I keep repeating this to myself, I know I will keep growing.
As a closure to 10 amazing months I even got a tattoo on my wrist that says Live Life. A small reminder I see every single day, just to remind myself that life is short and you have to make most of it. I lived life in Australia and will never ever forget that.
Do you have any life lessons? Something you use/say to keep yourself sane? To force yourself to talk to a stranger? Live Life!